July 25: Reuniting with the artists

July 25, 2012 by Leave a Comment

Wednesday is the only day of the week that I am truly a “working mother”, where I actually have chunks of my day devoted to both roles.   Let me tell you.  It started out good, really good.  Then sucked.  Really sucked.   Then OK.  And then I got the kids and my day turned completely around.

Highlights of the Morning:

  • I woke up and immediately started organizing and taking out the trash bins.   I got home late last night, in the dark, so couldn’t get to this last night.  So there I was in my PJs walking my grounds grabbing gardening clippings and old sprinkler hoses and looking at the morning sun and breathing the crisp air while dodging the chickens.   I also packed down boxes from the IKEA office that is being assembled.
  • I got through a LOT of emails since I worked late last night to organize these upcoming meetings in Fall.  I received a speaker confirmation from a big industry player so am thrilled – and had a great conversation with him on the phone.  I love the fact that these people call me.  They call me back!   And I can sell the opportunity on-the-fly and convince this industry leader that it makes sense for him to come to MY meeting!   I love it.  I was pumped.
  • And then I had to leave for a mediation appointment.   I just can’t go there.   I completely do not trust this man.   And now our agreement on an improved daycare situation for Twin Crazy and Twin Husky is in jeopardy because of cost.  No kidding it’s expensive to live out here with daycare with four kids.  NOW HE GETS IT???!?!?!?!??!?!?    I sat there and all of the arguments that I was trying to convince him of about the unaffordability of this place were thrown back at me during this meeting.  By him AND our mediator.   Our mediator was shocked at the amount of money we spend in daycare.  No kidding.    It’s again like throwing salt in the wounds that are trying to heal.  I know this already.  I was pleading for years.   And here we are.   No resolutions so we may be in court next week.
  • Afterwards, I drove to the kids neighborhood but I worked in a local Starbucks.  I love that place.  I got a TON of stuff done.  Lots of coordination and follow up that I needed to attack and I really was so productive.   I then went to pick up the kids.

The Rest of the Day:

  • I showed up at Big Bro and Red’s daycare and was a bit shocked at their art fair.  I didn’t know it was happening.  But the classes each created art for auction to raise money for the school.  Big Bro’s class did photography.  He took a picture of ducks swimming.   Red’s class did pasta painting.  She created a colorful flower out of colored pasta.  They were more interested in eating the food (grapes and goldfish) but they also were proud of their art.  So was I.
  • Pick up with the Twins was hysterical.  Both were screaming Mommy Mommy Mommy!!!!!!   Twin Husky was so excited that he kept throwing his Tiger up in the air.  He kept doing it over and over again and his little body was catapaulting the stuffed Tigers all over the place.  So cute.  Twin Crazy was also excited and giving lots of hugs and kisses.  Twin Husky is using more of his words and he said “Mommy come over here” and he wanted to show me a bug.  It was a rolly-polly.  I told them that if they touch it, it will turn into a ball.  So I did and we were all laughing.  And then Twin Husky, clueless as usual, tried it as well but wound up smashing it all over the sidewalk.  Poor thing.
  • On the ride home we did not have any music but all talked.  Twin Crazy is amazingly verbal.  She was having full blown conversations about the guinea pig and the animals at the house and how we lock the doors to stay safe and how foxes eat chickens and on and on and on….   We talked about the motorcycles and how they weave along lanes of cars in traffic and how that can be dangerous.  We talked about the commuter train.  We talked about motorcyclists who were driving more safe than others.  We talked about how I saw deer on the road the other day.  We talked about the fog.  We talked a lot but I think Twin Crazy honestly did most of the talking.
  • At home I started on dinner and the kids went with me to get the mail.   We met neighbors walking their dog Rocco – a huge friendly dog that scared Twin Husky but thrilled Twin Crazy.   Red kept wanting to “do something” with me; we settled on Legos and I was going back and forth with Big Bro and Red while the Twins were outside talking and raking chicken poop.
  • Kids ate well.   We had smoothies for dessert.
  • Afterwards we did more Legos, and also drew.  Twin Husky and Twin Crazy were very proud of their art.  We hung everything on an “art wall” that I have in the kitchen and they were excited.  Red was coloring and I handed her the colors for her work.
  • Bedtime went really well.  They all listened with brushing teeth.  Twin Crazy and Twin Husky can now “spit” so I guess I can start them on real toothpaste tomorrow night.   All kids were good with books and all kids settled into bed reasonably fast.   It was a good night.

One thing that I’m really struck by is the difference in the Twins each Wednesday when I see them.  Only 3 days have gone by, but they are different.  Honestly.  I can’t believe how talkative Twin Crazy was tonight.  

I got soooooo much attention from all the kids.  I love Wednesdays.   I felt super productive at work – even though it was only a 1/2 day for me – and was reunited with the kids.   I can go to sleep happy tonight despite the mediation morning, which sucked royally.

Til tomorrow –

– Mama K

Filed Under: Daily Journal Tagged With: , , , , , ,

Gig Tips: Believe in Yourself

July 24, 2012 by Leave a Comment

I came across this article today and thought it great to share with us working mamas.  I know the feeling of having two left feet very well.  I know how it feels to seem inadequate in all that I do.  I know the feeling that I’m somehow dropping the ball on someone, something, somebody.   I know this.   I read this article and a lot triggered thoughts in me.  Although its focused on feeling confident for landing a job, I believe that we should all believe in these words in our day to day lives – at work AND at home with our children.  

I’ve inserted my comments where relevant.

picture credit: http://shalinijena.wordpress.com/2011/10/25/what-do-you-believe-in/

 

Let me know what you think.

 

article source:   Simply Hired,   5 Ways to Get Your Swagger On

July 19, 2012

5 Ways To Get Your Swagger On

By Robin Fisher Roffer

So many people I know who once had major success in high profile positions now feel like they can’t get even get a phone call returned. One former television executive just asked me, “Am I pathetic?”

When you question yourself in this way, you don’t show up, uncertainty does. You may think you’re fooling everyone with the right clothes and your game face, but your insecurity is all they see.

Today’s decision makers want to be reassured that they are making the right choice by hiring with you. There’s a lot of doubt in the business world and when you doubt yourself, you just add to it.

Here are five ways to step away from self-doubt and career uncertainty:

1. Connect With A Supportive Community.

Community creates contentment. That’s why it’s important not to isolate. When we separate ourselves from our feelings and from positive influences, we sabotage our happiness. To connect with your highest self, get into a group that meets regularly and say “goodbye” to people who don’t believe in you.

Mama K comment:  Look in your community for working mother groups.   Find colleagues who are working mothers and go out to lunch, coffee, etc.  Make time for each other.   Visit www.mamainmotion site frequently.  🙂

2. Move Like Jagger.

To instill confidence, you have to move in a way that tells people, “Pay attention to me. What I do and have to say matters.” Make a list of all of your accomplishments to remind yourself of how talented and valuable you really are and then read that list right before you make an important call or walk into a meeting.

Mama K comment: Look at what you have accomplished!   You have created another human being, or two, or three, or four….   You can get yourself dressed in the morning and the kiddos out the door…. you have a job and are earning money…. you are able to multi-task….   Think about the things that you offer your workplace that only you can do.   Think about how you have grown as a worker because of your experience having children (e.g., negotiating, listening, hearing, solving problems….).    BELIEVE IN YOURSELF and HOLD YOUR HEAD HIGH!!! 

3. Be Cooperative, Not Competitive.

Yes, you have to stand out from the pack to get a great job or make an awesome deal. Just don’t be ugly about it — when you throw dirt, you lose ground. You want to be seen as a relationship builder who works well with others and can motivate a team to excellence – someone who can collaborate and co-create with a lot of different personalities.

Mama K comment: We teach this to our children.  Treat those like you would want to be treated.  The best way to teach our children this is through example.  Be that role model that you want to be for your children.  Do it at home, and do it at work too.

4. Stop Asking Everyone What They Think.

Let’s face it, you’re not seeking advice, you’re seeking approval. And the more advice you get, the more confused you become. The answers are inside of you. Listen carefully to your gut and let it guide you to what you really want.

Mama K comment:  I love this one.  Aren’t we all like this when we start out?  We are so unsure of ourselves?  Remember the first hour, day, week, you held your first child?   Now look at you!   You are an expert!   Think of all the other things that you KNOW you can do BETTER than others.   Again, BELIEVE IN YOURSELF.   Listen to what your intuition tells you.  You’ve learned this at home with your babies.  With your children.  Somehow you just know fundamentally what they need.   Apply the same thinking to yourself.  Trust your intuition and instinct.  Be that expert at work!   You have the answer!   BE SELF CONFIDENT!   You are a superwoman!

5. Communicate With Yourself Authentically.

More than ever, people are in fear and they want to be around those with inner strength. Now is the time to know yourself, be sure of yourself and stop apologizing for who you are. If you can’t see past your failures, start being conscious in each moment so you can feel the goodness in you.

The purpose of all communication is about love, not judgments or manipulation. Check your motivations. If you’re coming from a place of desperation, scarcity or fear, stop right there and do something to take care of you. Go for a long walk, volunteer, have a good meal, get a massage or play with your children. You’ll find that through self-care your attitude will improve and the right opportunities will come knocking.

Mama K comment:   This one is deep.   Communication is so key.  But this is asking so much more.  It’s asking you to look deep within yourself and know who you are and what you want.  Be honest with yourself.  I think this is REALLY hard for working mothers to do… my thinking is that we spend so much time thinking about others that it is easy to push ourselves aside.   This is a reminder to bring you back.   And when you talk, when you have an opinion, and when you voice your opinion, TEST yourself.    Are you being true to yourself?  Are you being sincere?  Genuine?   If you catch yourself saying no, you need a “time out.”

 Thanks for listening –

– Mama K

Filed Under: Gig Tips Tagged With: , , , , ,

Random Thought: Biggest bargain office ever?

July 23, 2012 by 1 Comment

It’s a Monday. A day without the children. I usually would do daily journals capturing the transitions between being a mom and working, and then working and being a mom again. Since my separation/divorce, these daily journals just don’t make much sense anymore so I am changing up my normal routine.

Last night after I dropped the kids off, I decided to go shopping. I knew where I was going. IKEA.

Remember those days of dorm living? Remember those days after college when you got a place of your own? Remember the deals and steals at IKEA? The particle-board furniture that looked pretty damn good?

Well, I went to IKEA last night. And believe it or not, I bought an ENTIRE room of office furniture for me and the kids for get this…. $526 including sales tax. This included: one computer workstation, two sets of drawers, one double-desk, two single desks, and four little white stools for the little ones. So I get my office, plus the four kids get their OWN desks and chairs for homework (Big Bro) and “work” (aka creative arts) for the other ones! I’m so excited!!!! And hopefully it will look good/reasonable/passable…. oh I’ll just through some plants around and cute drapes and I’m sure it will be fine.

ENTIRE ROOM!!! $526 WITH TAX!!!!

20120723-213704.jpg

Now the hard part…. getting the OLD stuff out (conference room table that is HUGE and heavy, two filing cabinet drawers that are HUGE and heavy) and the new stuff built…. I just brought all the boxes from my car to the house and almost tore my voice-box out when one of the boxes slammed from my step into my throat. Now I sound like Demi Moore.

Wish me luck with the Swedish wrench tool.

Where are you finding unbelievable steals/deals to prepare for the next school year????

Til tomorrow –
– Mama K

Filed Under: Random Thoughts Tagged With: , , , , ,

Staying Sane: Pamper yourself

July 22, 2012 by Leave a Comment

This post will be QUICK since its from my phone, it is very late, and I’m just exhausted from a crazy couple of weeks

Anyway, I always find that a good home-spa treatment is a great way to decompress and feel more like yourself. Think mud mask, lotions, painting nails. A good haircut also helps since we are on the topic of personal care.

And yes, my kids got manicures today and some mommy-haircuts. They will look fabulous tomorrow, even twin husky who wanted his nails “blue”, his favorite color.

Great week all –
– mama k

20120722-231744.jpg

20120722-231756.jpg

20120722-231803.jpg

20120722-231810.jpg

Filed Under: Staying Sane Tagged With: , , ,

July 18: Teeth

July 18, 2012 by Leave a Comment

Wednesday, working 1/2 day from home, then I get the kids.  We had a big day today.

Highlights of My Working Day:

  • I woke up super early.  Did some laundry.  Set up for work.  It was chilly so I put the fire on.   I love this house.
  • I was very productive today.  I arranged speakers for two forums and talked with an ex-colleague.   Sent out some emails regarding a media interview.  I may be interviewed on Monday; I’ll find out over the next day or two.
  • I wrapped up at 12:30 to get the kids.

Highlights of the Rest of the Day:

  • Picked up all kids; went to the Dentist!  All kids were great.  Red got x-rays.   Kids played before hand.  Big kids were amazingly still and calm during their checkup so Twin Crazy and Twin Husky were completely OK with their check up.  They all did great.  Big Bro picked mint toothpaste, Red picked Orange, Twin Husky picked Grape, and Twin Crazy picked Strawberry.
  • We went to Home Depot to return some dead plants and I picked up some others that will thrive around the house.  I pulled the divorced mom of four kids story and got 50% of my new plants, after returning the dead ones with tags still on them (but no receipt).   I was pumped.
  • Got back to the house and the Legos arrived from Amazon.  All kids were busy with their Legos.
  • We ate fast – Twin Husky cut up his hot dog.  
  • The grandkids next door (other next door – the house with the chickens) came over to play.  We played ball in the backyard.  So I had 7 kids on my hands.
  • I picked some weeds and fed the chickens.
  • Bedtime was rough.  The kids are taking a long time to get used to this transition at this house.  I talked with the girls for awhile.   Twin Crazy is a parrot to Red.  She repeats EVERYTHING.  Questions and all.   “Do foxes walk on two or four legs?  Do foxes eat chickens?  Do foxes eat guinnea pigs?  Do foxes eat fish?   What do dogs eat?  How do dogs eat?  I love the sound of crickets.   Is the guinnea pig safe because he’s in his cage?”
  • I told Twin Crazy that I loved her and kissed her forehead.  She said I love you right back.  I did the same for Red.  I told them that I’m so happy that they are here.

I had a great day.  I felt super-productive at work, and had a really long and diverse time with the kids.  Dentists, plant shopping, Legos, playing ball…. it was great.

Filed Under: Daily Journal Tagged With: , , , , , , , ,

Gig Tips: 7 Habits of Highly Effective People

July 17, 2012 by Leave a Comment

I came across the article below that summarizes the “7 Habits of Highly Effective People”, by Steven Covey who died today.   

I’ve added my commentary about the implications to working mothers.   After reading through the 7 Habits, and thinking about the Working Mother, I honestly believe that Working Mothers have it harder at first, but over time, the fact that we work and have kids sharpens these skills and actually puts us at an advantage.    Perhaps being a seasoned Working Mother by definition means that you are “highly effective”.

Please add to this and let us know your thoughts…

*****

RIP Stephen Covey: Here Are His Famous ‘7 Habits Of Highly Effective People’

Shlomo Sprung|Jul. 16, 2012

source:  http://www.businessinsider.com/stephen-coveys-7-habits-of-highly-effective-people-2012-7#ixzz20uFn88TJ

“In honor of renowned author Stephen Covey, who died this morning at age 79, we’ve decided to succinctly break down the “7 Habits of Highly Effective People” from his all-time best-selling book, which sold 20 million copies.

Here’s the short version… “

“1) Be Proactive

As human beings, we are responsible for our own lives. We have the independent will to make our own choices and decisions, and the responsibility (“the ability to respond”) to make the right choices. You have the freedom to choose your own fate and path, so having the independent will, imagination and self-awareness to make the right move makes you a proactive, and not a reactive, person.”

Mama K’s thoughts on the Implications to Working Mothers:

  • Sometimes this is difficult to believe in when you feel that you need to provide the best for your family.  I’ve written a lot recently about the tradeoffs between Money and More Quality Time with Your Family.   You may FEEL like you do not have a choice, but in many cases you actually DO have that choice.  Take charge of your life.  You only get one of them.   Believe in the choices that you have in front of you.  See the choices.   Believe that they are within reach.  Do not fear change.  Go for it.  Whether it be the decision to scale back work to spend more time with your children, or go for that promotion at work, or decide to change jobs/careers… you get it.   Don’t get stuck.  Believe in yourself and KNOW that you DO have choices in front of you.   You need the courage to SEE them.

“2) Begin With The End In Mind

Mental visualization is extremely important. Covey says that all things are created twice: first, the mental conceptualization and visualization and a second physical, actual creation. Becoming your own creator means to plan and visualize what you’re going to do and what you’re setting out to accomplish and then go out and creating it. Identifying your personal statement and your principles will help.”

Mama K’s thoughts on the Implications to Working Mothers:

  • This is also difficult for working mothers to do at first.  Sometimes our time horizon is just getting through the week, or even getting through the day unscathed.   It is difficult to raise your head above the day-to-day craziness and  juggling of work and home to see that longer-term path.   But I’ve heard that it gets easier.   And as the kids grow your time becomes more of your own.  And your focus can be realigned more with your career.   But even if it is not, even if you want that long-term horizon to be you as a mom being the best mom you can be, you can still chart your course.  Imagine, visualize, and then make happen.  
  • For me, I’ve always envisioned being the one to drop off the kids at school and being there for them for pick up and to help with homework while food is cooking; that vision is still in my mind.  And I am still working hard to make that happen.

“3) Put First Things First

With your power of independent will, you can create the ending you want to have. Part of that comes with effective time management, which is divided into what is urgent and what is not urgent. If you deal with crises, pressing problems and deadline-driven projects first, your life will be a lot easier.”

Mama K’s thoughts on the Implications to Working Mothers:

  • We have a leg-up here ladies.  If ANYONE can multi-task, resolve problems, prioritize, and effectively use our time, WE can.  We can do this in our sleep.  Being a mom has trained us.  Applying these skills professionally becomes more natural to us.   Think of whack-a-mole.   Working mothers, I believe, are simply trained personally and professionally to excel here.

“4) Think Win/Win

If you believe in a better way to accomplish goals that’s mutually beneficial to all sides, that’s a win/win situation. “All parties feel good about the decision and feel committed to the action plan,” Covey wrote. “One person’s success is not achieved at the expense or exclusion of the success of others.” If you have integrity and maturity, there’s no reason win/win situations can’t happen all the time.”

Mama K’s thoughts on the Implications to Working Mothers:

  • Think about how you negotiate with your children.  Think about how you position things/plans/activities/responsibilities with your kids to get them motivated to do the things you want them to do.  For example, giving them a CHOICE between something (e.g., carrots, or string beans?) and packaging it in a way that makes it seem like they are in control.  They feel independent, and you get them to eat their veggies.  Win / Win.   We know how to do this and we do it daily with our kids.  All of the time.  This is a skill that we have perfected.

“5) Seek First To Understand, Then To Be Understood

If you’re a good listener and you take the time to understand a concept, it will help you convey your opinions, plans and goals to others. It starts with communication and strong listening skills, followed by diagnosing the situation and then communicating your solution to others.”

Mama K’s thoughts on the Implications to Working Mothers:

  • Again – being a mom has surely helped you to go beyond your own needs to think about the needs of someone else.  As your babies grow, they communicate to you.   We’ve learned that to stop the tantrums from happening, we proactively LISTEN to our children and we let them know that WE HEAR them and that we UNDERSTAND.   We REPEAT the issue to the child (my goodness that IS a big owie.  You must have been scared when you fell down.  That must have hurt you!).   Providing a solution afterwards is always easier after the person/child knows that you’ve heard them, see them, and understand.

“6) Synergize

Synergistic communication, according to Covey, is “opening your mind and heart to new possibilities, new alternatives, new options.” This applies to the classroom, the business world and wherever you could apply openness and communication. It’s all about building cooperation and trust.”

Mama K’s thoughts on the Implications to Working Mothers:

  • The wonder of our children help us here.  Their minds are unlimited.  They don’t have strict biases.   They are possibly the most creative that they will be – over time our creativity becomes stiffled for some reason.  I believe that working mothers can learn from our children here and apply how children think to the working world.  Keep an open mind – break down your barriers of thought.   Working moms are lucky to have their kids serve as role models for them.

“7) Sharpen The Saw

Sometimes you’re working so hard on the other six habits that you forget about re-energizing and renewing yourself to sharpen yourself for the tasks in front of you. Some sharpening techniques include exercise and nutrition, reading, planning and writing, service and empathy and commitment, study and meditation.”

Mama K’s thoughts on the Implications to Working Mothers:

  • This is commonly understood.  “A happy mommy is a happy family”.   You need to take care of yourself.   Working mothers become aware of this need almost immediately – almost the first day back from maternity leave.  The question of “how the hell am I going to be able to DO all of this???” and then short-changing yourself.  It is not sustainable.  Hopefully the working mother learns this early and makes choices early on so as not to lose herself.

What do you think????   What else resonates with you???  Please share your thoughts!

Thanks for listening –

– Mama K

Filed Under: Gig Tips Tagged With: , , , ,

Random Thoughts: How do you commute?

July 16, 2012 by Leave a Comment

My commute has changed over time.

  • When I first started to work when I was single, I still lived with my dad and I drove to work each day.

20120716-212314.jpg

  • When I moved to the NYC metro area, my commute changed based upon the location of my job. When I worked downtown at the World Financial Center, I would mostly walk and then take the subway. On glorious spring and summer days, I would walk to the ferry station and take the ferry across the Hudson with a breathtaking view of the Trade Towers. I remember thinking to myself that my daily commute would never be as spectacular as that. I was right. When I changed jobs mid-town, I would either take the bus or the subway, depending on my mood at the time.
  • When I was working abroad in Frankfurt Germany, I walked exclusively.
  • When I was working abroad in Zurich Switzerland, I took a tram. It was lovely.
  • When back in NYC going to MBA school, I would take one subway and one bus.
  • When I moved to California, I first drove and then sometimes took a bus. Then I moved in with soon-to-be hubby and I walked. Then the kids came and I walked with a stroller, and then a double stroller. When we moved to burbs I was back on a ferry with a fast walk to/from the office.
  • Now I am in the burbs of the burbs. I drive to the train, take the train, and fast-walk to work.

To be honest, I like being on the train again. I like looking out the windows of the world passing by. I like the changes in the neighborhoods and the movement of the people… going places. I like that you have to be on your toes. Aware of your surroundings. It makes me feel alive again. I like the fact that when you get off of the train the fast-walking begins. I feel like a piece of me is back in NYC but at a much slower, nicer pace. It is funny the difference between west coast and east coast subway/train commuting. There is still a smell of urine, only sometimes is there music, but generally all of the time there is patience, and right of way. People line up at the train station which is really not the norm in NYC, unless things have changed over the past 10 years since I’ve been there (I think not).

Which has gotten me to thinking about commutes in general – humor me and participate in these polls:

 

Thanks for participating!
– Mama K

 

Filed Under: Random Thoughts Tagged With: , , , , ,

Staying Sane: HAPPY BIRTHDAY MAMA IN MOTION

July 15, 2012 by Leave a Comment

OMG I can’t believe it.   I JUST realized right now that Mama in Motion is 1 year old today!!!    July 15…..

I can’t believe it.   I knew it was sometime this month but did not realize it was TODAY!!!

I’m going to have to do some celebrating.  Not sure how.   So much as happened this last year and I actually feel so grateful for having this as a channel for me to help express how I’m feeling but hopefully this has also helped other working mothers out there along the way….

This is actually a bit bittersweet since this past year (and months before that) have been so difficult for me.  It’s painful for me to read prior posts of when I was trying to keep my head above water and in the midst of depression.  And seeing the kids so little and not realizing at that time that we would now have split homes and their lives forever changed.

But on a happier note, I am so happy that I’ve kept this project going.  And I do get a thrill each time I receive a comment.  Especially from someone brand-new who is introducing themselves to the group.   We are a diverse and STRONG set of women.

 

I’m looking forward to celebrating this milestone and continuing this journey with all of you.

 

– Mama K

Filed Under: Staying Sane Tagged With: , , , , ,

July 13: Great day because of a dead car??!!?!

July 13, 2012 by Leave a Comment

It’s Friday.   My car is still dead.  Battery.   This was a sweet blessing.  I couldn’t drive Big Bro and Red to daycare.  So instead, we had  a day at my house.  I usually take them out on activities while I have them all, but today we were stranded.  So it was a bit unusual but still so sweet.

Highlights of the Morning:

  • I woke up to Twin Husky, Twin Crazy, and Red all at the same time.
  • I checked the car.  Yes, it was dead.  YES!
  • I decided it would be a long breakfast day.  Pancakes.  Shit.  I only had a tiny bit of the instant stuff.  The other stuff requires milk and egg.  I had no eggs.  SHIT.  Big Bro and Red offered to go next door to our neighbor’s house to sweet talk some fresh eggs.  It worked.  They said they must be for breakfast.  Big Bro and Red replied “Pancakes”.   They each came back with one egg.  One orange, one blue.   Fresh from the chickens.  I love this place.
  • The kids made a maze for Cocoa which included his house, his new toy tunnel, and a huge blanket.   There were some fights over who could go into the “girls room”.   For some reason Twin Husky is always the kid that is left out.  He is sometimes backed up by his twin Twin Crazy, but oftentimes not when in front of big sister and big brother.  I had to enter the room and bring Twin Husky with me, and remind him to be well behaved, not throw anything, and not put anything in his pockets.
  • Afterwards some of us fed weeds to the chickens and also rotated the compost bin while we were out there.  
  • I was checking and responding to emails.  I conference call that I had scheduled at 10 AM was cancelled.  Thank goodness since I took the call originally thinking I would be on the highway.  Now that I was home with all four a call with a client would not have been possible.  I’m glad it was cancelled on me.
  • The kids were enthralled by the sewer guys doing routine maintenance cleaning out the roots and debris from the underground sewer system.  The workers had to use the backyard to get to a sewer cover in the back.  They commented on the work that was done in the backyard, and that the other neighbors did not have the tiered patio the way that I do.  They complimented the look of the house and congratulated all of us.  The kids just wanted to know if there was too much poop that clogged up the sewer or not.
  • Big Bro saved pages in his Star Wars Lego encyclopedia for the different sets that he is interested in “building”.  He must have had 20 pages flagged.  I asked him to narrow it down to 1 or 2.  He seriously got so excited at the thought of a new set that he anxiously ran into the house to start culling the possibilities down.
  • I did some laundry and the kids loved it.
  • Then we just did some relaxing.  I was making lunch and turned around to see Red reading a book, the boys playing quietly with Cocoa, and Twin Crazy getting set up to read.   So sweet.  I love hanging out in the house with them, just being ourselves.
  • There were a lot of flies in the house so Big Bro went hunting for them with a fly swatter and then I carried the dead ones over to our venus flytrap.  I showed the kids how the flytrap works by putting flies into the leaves and they would quickly close.  How cool.   There’s no shortage of flies in this house so we’ll probably gather them faster than the plant can consume them.
  • The twins went down for their naps.

 

 

 

Highlights of the Afternoon:

  • Red and Big Bro were playing with chickens.  Red was picking them all day long.  She is really good at it.  The chickens just let her swoop them up.  There were a few times I caught Twin Husky chasing them with a rubber mallet and I’m glad the chickens are as fast as they are.
  • Big Bro and Red went shopping with me on my iPad for Lego sets.  I got one set for each kid.  Big Bro and Red helped me to pick out sets they thought that Twin Crazy and Twin Husky would like.  Big Bro was having a great time shopping.  He was great when I would sometimes say “too much money” and would not even cause a fuss.   Some of these Star Wars sets are outrageously expensive.
  • After naps, we snacked.  Twin Crazy then sat down and read some books out loud again.  I love this stage that she is in right now.
  • Kids went outside to run while I was waiting for roadside assistance for yet another jump-start.
  • It finally got there and the kids had a good time watching the car get “fixed”.

After dropping the kids off I went to the Toyota dealership to drop off the van.  They gave me a car to use in the meantime.  I Prius!    Half electric, half gas!  It gets 50 miles to the gallon!!  I love it!  I asked when they would come out with a minivan and the salesperson laughed.  They will be coming out with a station wagon and SUV so maybe a mini-van is not that far out of reach several years from now when the Toyota “dies” for good.

I had fun driving home and decided that I did not want to go home right away.  I went to a hot spot in my new town where they have AMAZING lamb-burgers (only 20% ground lamb… but SOOOOOO yummy).   A beer also hit the spot.  It felt good to be out.   In a normal environment.   I felt good.  I had a good day with the kids essentially doing nothing.   They were reasonably well-behaved except for the “my room” thing and teasing Twin Husky.  

It is chilly outside and I am typing in my living room under a cozy blanket with the fireplace on.  And a fly zooming around my head.  The crickets outside.   It was a good day.

Happy weekend all –

– Mama K

Filed Under: Daily Journal Tagged With: , , , , , , , ,

July 12: Children’s tears

July 12, 2012 by Leave a Comment

It’s Thursday; my day off; but it was not a good one for the kids.

Highlights of the 1st half of the Day:

  • Kids got up early.  I think it was Twin Husky who was in my bed first.
  • One by one I hear them get up; and also hear them playing with Cocoa.   I get up at 7:45 AM.
  • Fast breakfast today guys…. cereal, yogurt, fruit…. NOT pancakes, which Big Bro requests.   It’s a fast breakfast because I have to get Big Bro driven to his field trip today for day camp.  They are going to a golf course.  I think he will love it.   Both Big Bro and Red question me on why they have to go to daycare.   I honestly do not know what to say to them.  I’m disgusted that I have to bring them there on my day off, and that Twin Crazy and Twin Husky have to sit through four different car rides of at least 35 min – 1 hour.  It’s just not right.  It’s my day off.  I should be able to choose to have them be with me versus having them go to daycare, if I am willing and able to do it.  This arrangement is depriving the kids of each other.   And of the activities that I would be able to do with them if they were here with me.
  • We get to the golf course and we are there early.  So I get the kids out of the car so we can all explore the golf driving range a bit.  The kids were great.  We felt the grass and the difference of the grass on the putting area.  They counted and played with golf balls.  They watched golfers as they worked on the driving range.   They watched the truck sweep the balls off of the driving range.   It was great.   Big Bro’s class arrived and when we left Big Bro was in tears.  I got the rest of the kids to the car quickly.
  • Drop off for Red was fine.  She was clingy and would not let go of my arm.  They were all playing outside in the yard.  One of her teachers was looking through a magazine, shopping for school supplies.  I asked Red if she wanted to go “shopping” with the teacher.  That worked.  She sat on her lap and received hugs as they went through the magazine together.  This place is great with us.
  • On the way out, Twin Crazy and Twin Husky couldn’t help but play in the kid-kitchen area.  They’re favorite spot.
  • I drove home with the Twins.  I gave them applesauce pouches as a snack.   The ride back was uneventful.
  • The kids played while I made them lunch.
  • After lunch we read some books and then it was time for naps.  They decide to hide on the couch in hopes of me not seeing them.   They went to sleep easily.

Highlights of the 2nd part of the Day:

  • Twins woke up but later than I had hoped… 3:30.   I quickly got them a snack and packed them up for the trip to pick up Big Bro and Red.  
  • Big Bro pick up was fine; Red’s pick up was fine.  She was playing outside on a swing with her friends.  Her teachers told me that she was upset and crying 1/2 hour after I left her this morning.   I can’t stand to hear things like this.  Especially when she could have been home with me.
  • While I was talking to the teachers, the kids started to amuse themselves in Red’s classroom.  They were all in the book area either reading books, resting on the little furniture, or looking at the lizard and fish.   I went over to them and decided to rest with them.  To watch them play together and enjoy this time with them.  Twin Crazy was pretending to read a book out loud to us and then got angry and told her siblings to stop talking and pay attention.  So, so, cute.  I even got a video of that one.   I got them up and out by reminding them to drink water and Red ran over to the class’ water fountain and she served everyone water.    So cute.
  • I wanted to get home early to have time with the kids, but the day was working against me.  I had them all buckled in and then the car wouldn’t start.  I don’t get it.  Lights were going on but the engine wouldn’t even attempt to turn over.  I bought this car only 5 weeks ago.   So I called Toyota and while we were waiting I grabbed all four of the kids and took them back inside the daycare center to play.   They had fun with each other.  I was playing games with Big Bro and Red.   Twin Husky was cleaning and collecting blue Lego pieces.  Twin Crazy was showing me how she can balance her body on a table and pretend she could fly.
  • The jump on the car worked fine and they assured me that a drive of at least 30 minutes should fully recharge the battery.  They were wrong.  When I got home the car would not start back up.  SHIT.
  • I quickly made dinner since it was so late; immediately after dinner it was time to get the kids ready for bed.

I’m tired of seeing the kids strapped up in their car seats.  I’m tired of the questions on why they need to go to daycare and that they do not want to go.   I’m tired of dealing with the twins as they cry when they are getting put into their car seats. 

Contrast that to last week, when I was able to keep the kids on July 5 and July 6.  I took them to the library to get library cards and books.  I took them to a museum where the learned about injured wildlife and how people work to help these animals get better.   And they played with each other like kids in the summertime.   And made lemonade and tried to sell it (four customers!)

This was a summer that I was looking forward to.   And the opportunities with the kids together were great – I’m taking this time off but this is not working, at all.  It has not been good on the family.   Changes need to be made.

Til tomorrow –

– Mama K

Filed Under: Daily Journal Tagged With: , , , , , ,
«Previous Page
Next Page»