September 13: 10 days to go

September 14, 2012 by Leave a Comment

It’s the end of a Thursday, a day where I have the “day off”, but I just finished 3 hours of work after the kids went to bed.   My first big meeting is 10 days away and I am getting down to the wire.

HIghlights of the Morning:

  • Chocolate Thursday – kids ate great
  • Twin Husky was pretending to fix a broken handle on one of the kitchen drawers.  And then Big Bro tried to play and fix it too, causing friction between the two.   Ugggh.  Big Bro is in a foul mood this morning.
  • Everyone got dressed quickly.  Red helped Twin Crazy get dressed into a cute little dance / ballerina outfit.  I had no idea what they were doing.   Twin Crazy looked so adorable and was trying so hard to hold back the smiles when I saw her.   Red is an amazing big sister.
  • It was Big Bro’s picture day.   He sprayed his hair down and I put in some gel.  He picked out a Star Wars shirt to wear.
  • On the ride to school, we talked about colors, fog, factories, and saw a car with a little tiny ball on its antenna that looked like a sun wearing sunglasses.  That made us all crack up.
  • Big Bro had a hard time leaving the van to get to his class.  There were tears.  It was hard for me.
  • Red’s drop off was great.  I set her up with her diva friends and she barely looked back at me.
  • Twin Crazy and Twin Husky were happy to be headed home with me.
  • We went food shopping which was a hit.  They both loved the “car cart” and were very helpful to me for the entire trip.
  • Afterwards we played outside, I cleaned up a bit, and I heard them laughing a bit too hard.  Their “devious” laugh.  They had filled up the bathroom sink with hand soap and water.  Uggh.
  • Lunch.   Books.  Bed.

The Afternoon:

  • I had to lift Twin Crazy and Twin Husky as they were sleeping and put them in the car to pick up Big Bro and Red.
  • Pick ups were fine; ride home was fine.  I had some conference calls related to the forum coming up – coordinating with one of the speakers.
  • At home we saw a new delivery that happened while we were out…  our new patio dining set!!!!   IT LOOKS GREAT  and can seat 10 people.   I am pumped.  The kids were excited about eating outside from now on.
  • We played ball a bit, picked some weeds and fed the chickens.   Red played with Cocoa.  We had a snack at the patio set.   Big Bro and Red built a fort in the living room.   Twin Husky kept going pee pee and even went into the potty by himself when he had to poop.   No one knew he was in there until later – Red found him first and called out to me that he was going poop all by himself.   I had fun relaxing at the patio table reading a magazine while the kids played.
  • Dinner was great.  
  • I cleaned up the kitchen as the kids played.   Fired up some smoothie and the kids watched the rest of “A Bug’s Life”.
  • Got ready for bed; read books; kids were good.   Red was a bit sad at bedtime and needed some help.  

After the kids went to bed, I worked on conference stuff for a good 3+ hours.   This is stuff that cannot wait.   I am under the wire now and will likely be working on and off the entire weekend.   This upcoming week is my last week before the big meeting.   I’m feeling good though.  We have a killer Agenda, and a lot of Guests coming to the meeting that will likely become members.  I am hoping to convert 5 – 8 organizations as new clients which will make me look like a star.

Til tomorrow –

– Mama K

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September 7: Boogies, bottles, and boats

September 7, 2012 by Leave a Comment

Fridays are fun.  I get to be a stay at home mom.  But this morning was absolutely RIDICULOUS.   I mean, seriously, seriously ridiculous.   I am getting sick and I slept through my alarm.   All hell broke loose this AM as I was trying to get four kids out of the house and drive on two highways to get Big Bro to school on time….  the rest of the day made up for it.

Highlights of the Morning:

  • Woke up at 6:55 AM to Red, Twin Crazy, and Cocoa.  Realized what time it was.  Sprang out of bed like a bat out of hell.
  • There were no clothes set out the night before… and loads of laundry that still needed to be organized, dried.  I grabbed clean clothes from the dryer onto the floor so I could put the wet stuff in – otherwise Big Bro would have a problem with shorts.
  • I tried to make myself coffee to get through this.
  • Twin Crazy was hungry.  There was no way I could put her off.  I try to do breakfast in the car but only when we leave at 7 AM.   Oh shit.  I had to make breakfast now too for everyone or else there would be meltdowns.  I made 3 oatmeals pronto.
  • Big Bro came out quietly, fingering two bills (a $5, a $1).  The tooth fairy came last night, for the first time ever.  I tried to make a REALLY big deal about this but it was more rushed than I would have liked.  Big Bro was silent but smiling.
  • Twin Crazy was having issues with her nose.  Sneezing and snot all over the place.
  • Red was having breakdowns over pants, …. or then over socks…. , but then she figured it out and was OK when I checked on her.
  • I was running around trying to get kids clothes together.  Never, never, never will I ever have them go to sleep the night before without picking out their clothes.  Ever.  I promise myself now.  EVER.
  • Big Bro was hungry and wanting to eat; he requested bread and butter.  I softened some butter for him in the microwave and asked him to spread it himself.  He did great.
  • Then the kids said they wanted toast.  F!!!    I threw in some bread in the toaster to take in the car.
  • Twin Husky is throwing a fit because he’s trying to get socks on by himself and is getting stuck.  I help him through it.
  • Oh shit.  I have to do Big Bro’s lunch.  F!!!   You know this again is something that could be done the night before damn it.  I cursed myself.  Soft foods for his teeth.  OK.  Leftover pasta, yogurt.   He also packed up two slices of bread and butter.   This is good.  He’s helping to pack his lunch.  Awesome.
  • Twin Crazy sneezes again all over the place.
  • I finally got my coffee together.   Kids with shoes on.   I remembered to pee.   Twin Crazy is screaming for her blanket.    Twin Husky is having problems putting two Tigers into his little backpack.  OK, out the door.
  • Twin Husky falls down a step because his shoes are on backwards.   He is screaming outside but OK after 1 minute.  He told me that he was OK but it was “scary”
  • Once we got into the car it was great.  I dished out the toast.  We talked about the colors of cars and trucks.  It was actually relaxing.  I actually enjoy this time with the kids.   We are able to talk about things, they joke with each other and me, and it honestly is fun.  I keep the radio off so we can talk and hang out.
  • Drop off for Big Bro happened right on time.  He left the van like a big kid and made his way to his class.  I told him again how proud I was of him and his behavior at the Dentist yesterday.  He had his two teeth taped up in a tooth-shaped container with him.
  • Drop off for Red was great.  We were laughing with her friends about the rules: 1) Learn; 2) Laugh; 3) Exercise your body.    Her teacher said she is doing great with her letters, doing Upper and lower case letters and writing extremely well.  My god do I love this kid.
  • On the way out I again bought some things at the “everything must go” sale… some Jenga and wood blocks, and a bingo game with little words in the grid.   Big Bro and I can play this together.
  • The ride home was uneventful.  We stopped for gas, then I stopped at Walgreens to get a nose plunger for Twin Crazy.  Twin Husky looked a bit out of it.

Highlights of the Afternoon:

  • Twin Husky was in a foul mood.   I decided to feed them.  That worked a bit, but not really.   I looked at his face… his eyes were bloodshoot.  He said he wanted to take his Tigers into his room and go to sleep.   He put himself to bed after I gave him some Motrin.  Something is going around with these kids and I’m not sure if he’s getting something.  I thought it was so cute how he put himself to bed.  He slept for 3 hours.
  • In the meantime, me and Twin Crazy had some time to ourselves.  I plunged out her nose and she gladly let me.  It didn’t really work.  I taught her how to blow her nose.  We had fun with that.  That worked a little.  I gave her a haircut and cut her hair into bangs and angled the sides so she could see better with her “long hair”.  I watched her play castle and use her imagination with the dolls.  I took movies of her doing this.
  • We napped.   I felt like crap too.
  • We all got up, snacked, and I packed for the rest of the day.   The kids were excited and looking great.   I packed some bags, but this time much more leisurely.
  • The ride was completely traffic-free.  We talked about the water in the distance.  We got to Big Bro’s in plenty of time.   We picked up Red no problems.    We were off on our afternoon adventure – I had three hours with them before transition time to co-parent’s.
  • We were missing two waterbottles so we went to CVS.  The list was:  2 waterbottles, and a bottle of water.  The kids know about my lists.   That means we cannot get ANYTHING else.   They stopped me several times in the store from buying other items (it backfires on me but I can live with that).
  • We headed to a playground that I’ve never been to with the kids.  They had a blast.  Twins were sliding down slides and catching each other.  Red was running around.  Big Bro was talking on the phone (Nana, co-parent I think), taking pictures, and taking movies.   We snacked.  I enjoyed relaxing, eating fruit, watching the kids, and running after them.  It was a great afternoon.
  • Then the real adventure:  “Ferry-ride to nowhere”.  I took them on the commuter ferry and we headed to the city.  Stayed on the boat and then headed back.   A one-hour trip in total.  Kids were great.   We talked about boats, the bridge, the pelicans and how their beaks are big enough for an entire fish to go in there, the sound of the boat, the feeling of the waves… the kids ate graham crackers and drank from their water bottles.  They shared water and shared seats.   Big Bro and Twin Crazy were the best behaved so I gave them the tickets to give to the operators.  This made Red mad at me.
  • Drop off to co-parent’s was great.  We had a lot of information to exchange – dentists, teeth, who is sick and with what and at what time their last medicine was given, Red’s letters, Twin Crazy’s haircut, how great Big Bro was at the Dentist, the tooth fairy…
  • I made sure that Red was not mad at me anymore.  I talked with her at my car.  I said it was OK for her to feel mad at me.  I said I knew she still loved me.  But she needs to talk about it… get it out of her body.  I asked her a question, “Are you mad at me because I did not give you a ticket?”   and then I nodded her head for her up and down to say “Yes”.   She started to laugh.   She decided to get out of the car and asked for a piggy-back ride.   She was all smiles.   I told her how important it is for her to talk about her feelings and I asked her if we were “OK” with each other now.   She was all smiles.   Whew.   Last week I had a bad day with the kids because they were not listening to me and I swear those next few days were brutal for me.   I promised myself never to leave any of the kids with either me being mad at them or them being mad at me.   Never.  Ever.

I’m feeling like shit physically – sore throat and headache.  But I honestly am so full inside – little by little I am making my way at having one-on-one time with each of the kids; maybe not EVERY day, but at least weekly I am able to carve out good, quality time with each of them.   I’ve had them since Tuesday night and this morning was a nightmare.  So I’m ready for a night to myself.   I will see them tomorrow afternoon at 4 PM.   I’m looking forward to a good night’s sleep, hopefully getting rid of whatever germ is inside of me, and seeing them tomorrow afternoon.

Have a great weekend all –

– Mama K

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July 8: Back in the saddle again

August 8, 2012 by Leave a Comment

I’m feeling much better today.  Thank you to those that reached out.   Today was a great day.   The kids are here and the crickets are chirping outside and I’m sitting in my home office with new desks and computer and I’m feeling at ease.

Highlights of the Morning:

  • I woke up early and got ready for my “work at home” day.  Showered, made coffee, grabbed a box of cereal, and booted up in the office.   Did you ever notice how Safeway brands call their products?   The Safeway line of cereal modeled after “Life” is called “Live it Up”.   Isn’t this hysterical?    I have to check out other products.   I’m buying very frugally these days, can’t you tell??!?!?
  • I got a lot of work done today.   Started organizing our focus-group for our meeting in September, sent out planning status to our membership, did some admin items like billing.
  • I would step outside in the sunshine and stretch for a break.  Water the garden.  Look at the bluebirds flying.
  • I started working on a sales document for another forum I am building.  We have lunch meetings next week that this needs to be ready for and I also have a list of REAL contacts at potential members so I need this to get that part started.

The Afternoon:

  • I grabbed Cocoa and headed to the van.   I stopped at the pet store and they did nothing for me.   The last guinea pig had ringworm, with the symptoms of a dry ear.   And they took the animal back and brought it to their vet.   Cocoa, 2nd guinea pig, has a dry ear.  One person told me to bring her in.  I did.  Then the manager said they wouldn’t do anything since it was past 15 days.  But it was past 15 days with Batman, the first guinea pig.  There was nothing they would do.   I absolutely detest big chain animal stores.   I am officially anti-PetCo.   From here on out.   I have a sweet guinea pig that may have ringworm suffering from an itchy ear.   Ugh.
  • I headed to a gyno appointment in the city, with Cocoa in tow.  She sat in a cool, indoor parking garage while I was violated upstairs at the gyno.   Note the plastic model vaginas on the windowsill.

  • We headed to get the kids!
  • I decided to bring Cocoa into the daycare.  Red was excited to see me with Cocoa.  Her friends were excited and so were her “teachers”.   It was so sweet to see Red so nurturing.   She is wonderful with that little piggy.
  • Big Bro was also excited to see Cocoa but he wanted to hold her and pay attention to her away from his friends.  He had no interest in showing the piggy to his friends.
  • We picked up Twin Crazy and Twin Husky; they were busy riding tricycles.
  • We headed home and hit some traffic along the way.  Big Bro fell asleep first.  And then Red.   Twin Crazy and Twin Husky were wide awake.  We were talking about the sunshine, flags, trains, counting, smelling their feet.  They were both very talkative.
  • When we got back the box with Cocoa fell off of Big Bro’s sleeping lap.   Cocoa tumbled out along with her food and hay everywhere.  She hid under his seat but he was able to pry her out.

 

The Rest of the Night:

  • Big Bro threw a fit that we forgot his backpack at daycare.   I think Cocoa threw our routine off.
  • The rest of us went outside to clean Cocoa’s cage.  Big Bro came out when I asked him if he wanted to use the hose to hose down the bottom of the cage.
  • I started cooking dinner.  I decided that pasta stars were in order since Big Bro was upset, and rightfully so.
  • The rest of the kids were outside looking at the chickens.
  • The doorbell rang and it was the grandchildren of our chicken/farmer neighbors.  They had a huge bowl of cherry tomatoes for us.  I was thrilled.  The kids were adorable.   I walked them back to the front of the house so they could walk along the street to their grandmother, my neighbor.  I love this place.  3/4 of the kids were loving the tomatoes.
  • I asked Big Bro if he wanted to go get the mail for me.   He’s such a big guy.  He went without hesitation.
  • All kids ate like champs.   I couldn’t believe it.  All food was finished.  Even vegetables and fish.
  • Dessert was cherries and mango smoothie.
  • Big Bro, Red, and Twin Husky knocked next door to see if the kids would come out.  They were getting ready for bed.
  • The kids did some manicures with each other while I was cleaning up.
  • Then it was PJ, teeth, and book-time.   I’m getting each kid to pick out a book and meet me in the living room and I read to them all of the books all at once.  The great thing is the kids are all fast at picking out their books since the first one back gets to sit on my lap and read with me first.
  • Bedtime was AOK.  Twin Crazy was scared again of the dark, the kitty-cats, the foxes, the doggies.   I reassured her that the house was safe and she was safe.  She walked with me as I locked the doors and put on the house alarm.  She fell asleep soon thereafter.

 

 

It feels good to have them back over again.  Tantrums, tears, and everything else in between.   They are teasing each other a lot more now, but they are also playing together so well.  They look out for each other so well.  And the older ones, for the most part, are really good role models for the younger ones.

I’m feeling like myself again.  Thank goodness.   I’m ready to hit the sack.

Til tomorrow –

– Mama K

 

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August 3: My summer day as a SAHM

August 3, 2012 by 2 Comments

Amazing day.   Amazing.  Filled with kids’ laughter, my chores, kid interaction, and yes some fighting and challenges along the way.

I actually had an outing in mind, but decided not to do that since I still did not get a proper answer from Big Bro about the haircut.   [Note:  I found hair pieces under his desk in his makeshift “trashcan” so it really is incredible.  Either he DID cut Red’s hair, or someone else did and he just threw the pieces away.   I don’t know what really happened.  Still.]

So I didn’t want to treat them to a “trip” that I had planned.  We stayed at home.   So what happened during the day?

  • Woke up to Red, Twin Crazy, Twin Husky in my room.   Twin Husky now visually can recognize the numbers and he said that it was time for me to get up since there was an “8”.  He was correct.  8:03.  Time for me to get up.
  • I made them a pancake breakfast
  • Afterwards kids had pillow play in the living room.   Kids covering bodies with pillows.  Hide and seek.  Playfulness.
  • We got dressed; I did manicures and cut nails on the front porch
  • I did TONS of laundry.   With sheets and blankets and such I think about 6 loads in total.  The kids, in turns, helped to either change loads or help sort.
  • Girls played Legos together
  • We all had office time together.  I did a bit of work, rearranging meetings and setting meetings up for next week.   Kids were drawing.  Red was practicing her letters.   I played “African Playground” kids music and started dancing.  Twin Crazy danced with me and cackled she was having so much fun.
  • Snacktime:  Yogurt bar.   I had 3 different kinds of yogurts for the kids to pick from.  I had 6 bananas at the beginning of the event and zero bananas at the end.  I CANNOT BELIEVE HOW MUCH THESE KIDS EAT
  • We did some gardening; Twin Husky helped me to water our fruit trees and plants
  • We spent time outside but I’m not sure doing what.  I think we picked weeds and fed the chickens several times
  • Lunch:  build-your-own burrito bar.   The kids ate well.  Twin Crazy ate I think an entire can of black beans by herself.   My stomach hurt just watching her go.
  • Twin naptime.  They actually had a great nap today.   A proper nap.  During their nap Red and Big Bro did an outdoor finger painting project.
  • I vacuumed the entire house, and the couch.  My days with this vacuum may be limited so I wanted to make good use of it.   All cobwebs are now gone.  The house just breathes better.  Or maybe its my imagination.
  • During the couch vacuum kids of course had more cushion/pillow play.
  • Snacktime:  smoothies.  We had frozen bananas, fresh strawberries, left over peach slices from yesterday, and a handful of leftover carrots from lunch.   They loved it.
  • Kids had outside playtime – sidewalk chalk and bubbles; while I did some weeding and also cleaning up twig and branch debris from the yard.    I filled up a garbage bin.  I then also started to dis-assemble the long box of blinds that has been blocking the kitchen floor for weeks.  I guess putting up the blinds is my next project for the weekend.   During outside play time Big Bro had some issues with siblings so he was banished to his room for quiet time.  I brought him his Star Wars book that he loves and also suggested that he play with Legos.  That’s when he dumped them on the floor.  I demanded that he pick them up before coming outside to join us.  He stayed back there for quite awhile but then finally cleaned up, I think when he heard the commotion going on in the living room that he wanted to take part of….
  • Kids jumped on bubble wrap from said packaging of blinds.
  • Then it was time to go.   I packed them up and all seemed quite happy.  There was no whining about the drive and I told everyone that I had such a good time with them today.
  • After I dropped them off I headed over to a neighbor’s house and picked up some things she left for me
  • Once at home, I sat on the couch with the directions for the blinds and totally fell asleep.
  • Now I’m here, wrapping up the day and getting ready for bed.

I loved today.  For so many reasons.   It was a carefree day with just me and the kids.  We sortof just carried the day away.  No real plans except for feedings and nap time.  But everything in-between was just unplanned.  And the kids were kind of doing their own thing while I was also doing my own thing but then our worlds would intertwine throughout the day.   It was a day where I heard a lot of laughter.  And at times I just stood there, listening, and laughing to myself.  The kids really enjoyed this time today with each other.  They were all playing with each other, and even Twin Husky was largely accepted in the day’s play.

I feel like I had really good one-on-one time with each child at some point during the day.   I was able to connect with each one separately – either dancing, or talking about my owie (I got a bad finger cut today), or talking about the mysterious haircut…. I gave lots of hugs and kisses and look in your eyes smiles today.

I didn’t have a care in the world.   I was feeling like a mom with my kids and we were enjoying a summer day without interruption.   The only thing missing I suppose was a home cooked dinner.   But I can’t complain about that.

I feel fortunate for having this day with them.   And feel really full inside.

Have a great weekend everybody!

– Mama K

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August 2: Haircuts and sibling solidarity

August 2, 2012 by 1 Comment

Today was a full, great day… we did A LOT and also had some mishaps along the way.   My daughter looks trendier than I (not really that hard to do) because of this awesome haircut that one of her siblings gave her… but she keeps changing her story to protect their identity.

Highlights of the Morning:

  • I woke up to Twin Crazy, and then Red, and then Twin Husky… he is so sweet.  He climbs in smiling and cuddling and quiet.
  • Red wanted to “do something with me”.  Your kidding me.  I haven’t even been out of bed and my bladder is ready to burst and my breath stinks.  Plus I’m half asleep.  I suggested drawing/coloring something together and that worked.  She wanted a princess, prince, and castle.   She helped me draw it and then colored some of it in.
  • The kids talked me into making Thursdays “chocolate day” at mommy’s house.   I suggested Sundays, but Big Bro was violently against that since he likes the pancake routine on Sundays.  I suggested Friday, and he said that movie night is Friday night and that Thursday has nothing special.  This little guy should be a lawyer when he grows up.  The art of negotiation.  He can argue anything with sound logic.  Very persuasive.  So I broke out the Nutella and the kids went nuts.
  • I was getting the kids ready and in between one of the children changes Twin Crazy decided to give herself a haircut.   No, this is NOT the haircut that I referred to in the title of this post… it was just a few strands but still.  I couldn’t believe it.  So I took the kid scissors out of the office since the little ones “do not know how to properly use them yet”
  • The ride to their daycare was fine.  We talked about some funny things but I can’t remember what.   We talked about a food shopping list, and also played a spelling game.
  • On the way in we drove by a field that used to have wild rabbits but now is infested with moles.  They are so cute (when they are not in YOUR yard).   We saw so many… standing up, running, scurrying, jumping into the ground.  I stopped for a bit, and also drove very slowly down the side street so we could look at them.
  • Big Bro did not want to be dropped off with the siblings around.  So I left them in the front office of the daycare center so Big Bro could have his privacy.
  • Red’s drop off was great.  She knew I was going to pick her up early and was all smiles.
  • Twin Crazy and Twin Husky drank some water and Twin Crazy went to the potty.  And then we hit the road for our errands.
  • I had a work conference call so got to a playground just in time for me to take that call.  The kids were great – playing on the play structure, little tiny merry-go-round, playing in the sand.  I had a great call.
  • Afterwards we went food shopping.  They were in a “car cart” and they had a blast.  We did our shopping quickly.
  • We picked up the older siblings, got gas, and then headed home.  I had another conference call while on the road – this was a big “sell” meeting for a new member to the “established” forum that I manage.  This was a BIG win for me.   It was awesome.  I felt great.    Here I have four kids in a car (the majority of them sleeping) and am able to also land a deal.   On my day off.   And headed home to play with the kids.   It was great.

 

 

The Rest of the Day:

  •  Big Bro, Red and I went “hunting” for several spiders in the house.  I have to remember to close the screen door and front door in this place.   We have lots of cobwebs in here and I’m not a fan of bugs in general.  The kids examined the spider in the “bug vacuum” which was cute.
  • It was hot outside.  WATER PLAY!
  • That is when I noticed that there was a lock of red hair floating in the pool.  And it had a curl in it.   So I asked about this hair.  And I looked at Red’s head.  And couldn’t believe what I saw.  The back of her head is cut really short, but the sides are long and curly.  It almost looks cute, like it’s supposed to be like that…. but still… how did it get this way????   She kept changing her story.  Big Bro…. Twin Crazy… .then everything always gets blamed on Twin Husky.   I have no idea what to believe but I do not believe her.  And she is protecting her sibling.  Most likely an OLDER sibling.   Most likely the sibling who could get to scissors on his own since everything was taken away earlier in the day.  I asked where the missing hair was.  She said in the backyard.  Yes, she was right.  Various locks of red curls.   In my dead grass.  I was pissed, to say the least.
  • This put a damper on my mood.   I kept the older kids inside and let the younger ones play outside.   The older kids said they wished they were at daddy’s.  I wished they were too at that very moment.
  • We ate an amazing dinner and they all ate like champs.   I love how they know to expect vegetables and tonight we had sweet potatoes, cucumbers, and fresh broccoli.  Along with chicken and rice.    Lots of fruit for dessert.  My belly is still full.
  • After dinner I boycotted Big Bro’s request for a movie.  We went outside, I picked some weeds while talking to my mom, there were several kid breakdowns over shoes.
  • Big Bro and Red broke out the sidewalk chalk and that gave them all something to do while I cleaned up from dinner and also swept the outside.   It felt sooooooooo good to be doing that.  Sweeping in the evening after dinner while the kids were right there with me playing on their own, together.   I loved it.   I fed my compost bin and commented on the chalk “dust” that they were busy making.
  • Bedtime was fine.
  • After the kids went to bed I had some more work to do, following up and sending information to the folks I had on the calls today.

My day was really busy and extremely diverse.   Hunting for moles and spiders — two different haircuts — playground — shopping — driving and working and making money for the company — being tricked by the kids and witnessing fierce protection between them — and enjoying a suburban summer evening with the kids and the crickets.

I’m feeling really good now.   I loved today.   And the crickets are singing loud right now and I feel so happy to hear their song.

Til tomorrow –

– Mama K

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Random Thoughts: Interesting article – “Why Women Still Can’t Have It All”

June 25, 2012 by 3 Comments

THANK YOU Mama V for sharing this  –

http://m.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2012/07/why-women-still-can-8217-t-have-it-all/9020/6/

So much of this article resonated for me; the expectations, feeling of failure, stress.   If she is correct and we need society to change to make it better for the rest, I fear we will be waiting a LONG time – even though there are so  many working females out there.

I don’t know what the answer is but happiness for me at least is the CHOICE to do what you want to do; for me, working from home, flexible work schedule, telling myself that its OK to “side step” a career for a portion of my life, the notion of “investment intervals”….   Many people do not have the luxury of choice – if you have it, don’t be fearful but EMBRACE IT.   Do what you need to do for yourself and for your family.

What are your thoughts ladies???

Please read and let us know!

http://m.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2012/07/why-women-still-can-8217-t-have-it-all/9020/6/

– Mama K

Filed Under: Random Thoughts Tagged With: , , , , , , ,

May 31: One red raspberry and three big sticks

May 31, 2012 by Leave a Comment

Thursday, a day at “home” with Twin Crazy and Twin Husky.  We had a VERY busy day…

Highlights of the Morning:

  • Twin Crazy and Twin Husky were excited about their pockets in their shorts
  • Big Bro reminded us that he lost his bike privilege for the morning (not listening the night before).  How mature of him!
  • I dropped off Red with the Twins – no problems.
  • We made it back and I started to load up the van.  The big milestone today was the dresser, which I loaded all on my own.  I’m feeling unstoppable.  I’m doing this whole move myself – will likely not need any movers!
  • We stopped and had a yogurt snack, and then hit the road…

 

Highlights of the Afternoon:

  • We got there and went to water our trees and plants, as usual – what a surprise…. the apple tree, peach tree, and newly bought cherry tree were all devoured since last night!!!!   Almost every leaf gone!!!   I was on the phone with my mom when I discovered the violation of our trees – I was laughing.   Me and the Twins were talking about it.   We watered the “sticks” anyway and then later I moved them indoors just in case any new leaves would sprout and be left at risk.
  • The GREAT news is that I saw our FIRST raspberry.  IT WAS DAMN DELICIOUS
  • Twin Husky was busy at work with the mulch in a net.  Twin Crazy was busy with bubbles.
  • They napped and I started to organize my room – getting stuff out of the closet to make room for REAL closet items like clothes.  Moving boxes to the office, to the storage closet.   Then I moved the dresser to the house and into the room…. the clothes were reunited with the dresser and decorations put on top.   My room is starting to come together, or at least look less like a storage unit.
  • I rested on the rocking chair for a bit.
  • I started to weed and then they woke up.  Snack time.
  • I weeded some more and packed up the van with weeds for the trash bin at the other house.
  • I was totally tired on the way home.

 

 

 

Dinner and Bedtime:

  • I picked up BBQ on the way home.  Twin Crazy and Twin Husky were both hugging figurines of pigs.  Twinkle lights were on in the windows and Twin Husky was saying “Santa, Santa”.
  • We picked up Red, Big Bro.
  • We ate quickly and ran outside to play.   I didn’t realize it but Big Bro went around the corner to knock on our neighbor’s house.. .he didn’t tell me since he knew I would say it was an inappropriate time – he initiated the party that started at our driveway.  Me, the four kids, my neighbor, her four kids, and a random dog from down the street.  Me and my neighbor were drinking Guinness together and it was wonderful for me to have a moment of “real” time with a “real” person for this short moment.  It was the best fun I’ve had in awhile.
  • Afterwards I played puzzles with Red and Big Bro.   Bedtime routine was with both of them and I think we are all exhausted.

 

 

I had an amazing day.  I am so excited about the house.  Is it wrong for me to be so happy when the kids will be made to suffer?   Call me crazy, but I enjoy pulling out big weeds.  And I enjoy looking out over the yard and thinking of the possibilities.  I enjoyed the feeling of getting the boxes under control.   And I loved when Big Bro immediately asked me if we would be driving there tonight to pick up the mail or do some work.  I love that the kids are excited about the place too.  That is important to me.

I’m looking forward to the weekend, finally looking forward to them again!  I plan on being at my house the whole time and splitting the kids in duos.  I need to talk to co-parent about that.

Til tomorrow –

– Mama K

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Staying Sane: Ride like the wind

April 29, 2012 by 1 Comment

This weekend was a big weekend for Big Bro and Red. They are turning 6 and 4 soon, and co-parent decided to go out this weekend and get them suited up for their birthday presents…. new bicycles! So we grabbed the last bike that was big enough for Big Bro – a stretch actually – with gears and front/back handle breaks and all. We also suited up little Red in a fancy pink REAL bike with training wheels – and tassels to boot.

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Because of these purchases, we were hanging out quite a bit in the cul-de-sac courtyard behind our house this weekend. It is safer there and there are two houses of young kids. At first I was just camping out with the rest watching the kites, balls, bicycles, scooters, and running of the kids. And then Big Bro asked about his gears. And I started to teach him about them. But he had some problems turning the gears. So I got on his bike to learn how to do it myself. I spun around the courtyard and felt the wind in my face and then realized I needed to focus on learning the gears or else Big Bro would be disappointed. So I got that down, but then continued to ride. Around the cul-de-sac again and going faster and riding riskier and pedaling faster. My heart beating and hearing the wind now.

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This has been the most exercise I’ve gotten in too long of a time.

So I had to give the bike up. But then thought to myself – I’m going to grab MY bike — funny though. It is a mountain bike. And I have not rode on it in literally 7 or 8 years. So when I went to check it out, both tires were flat beyond repair and the cobwebs likely choked up the chains. So I grabbed co-parent’s bike.

I came blasting around the bend into the courtyard at warp speed (or at least I felt that way). My leg muscles felt good to be awake. My heart was pounding, my hair was shoved into my helmet but still flying around, the sun was on my skin and I was having FUN. I grabbed Big Bro and we took two loops around our neighborhood. I was talking to him as we went about the gears and the uphills and the downhills; he took to it so quickly and I had so much fun riding around with him.

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So now I have another thing to add to my “to-do” list: Get my own bike tuned up and fixed.

The exercise felt good. Being outside in the fresh air felt good. The sun felt good. Being with my son and the kids felt good. But the speed and the freedom and yes the tiny bit of recklessness was AMAZING. I’m looking forward to more of it and maybe shedding some pounds.

What do you Mamas do for exercise? What activities do you find liberating?

Have a great week to all –
– Mama K

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April 13: Feeling surprisingly relaxed

April 13, 2012 by Leave a Comment

A busy day; the last day of work before I leave for a work trip all next week. So I went into the office to work today since there is still so much to do.

Highlights of the Morning and Commute:

  • Twin Crazy went potty! I said we would get her changed to pick out her underwear. She was very excited to do this. She ran to her drawer and instead, pulled out stockings by mistake. But she wanted to wear them too. So Red and I went to her closet and picked out some dresses for her to decide on. She said that one was too tight but was VERY excited about a red one. I took pictures of her looking demure. She refused to smile. Red was smiling though, proud of her little sister and she agreed that she looked so cute.
  • Twin Husky was busy eating a bagel. Big bites along the whole bagel. He kept saying that it was a circle. He also loved the cream cheese.
  • Twin Crazy put on her rain boots by herself. She loves those things. They probably fit even better on her with stockings – versus her PJs which make the boots way to tight for her.
  • Red wanted me to help her with her clothes. She set them out in the order she wanted to get changed into… her top, her underwear, her pants, her socks. Very particular. There is an order to everything.
  • All the kids noticed holes in my socks and started laughing and teasing me and poking my feet, saying they were going to try to pick my toes. I acted silly with them and they loved it. I had all kids all around me looking at my feet and trying to get to my toes. We were all laughing. It was too funny.
  • Twin Crazy and Twin Husky were both taking care of their babies. Twin Crazy was feeding her baby a vitamin, and Twin Husky was feeding his Tiger a bagel.
  • Big Bro went riding with the Motley Crew. I dropped of Twin Crazy and Twin Husky, and then Red. I had to run back to the car to get her purse with her nail polishes. But this made her smile from ear to ear. I was running late for the ferry but was glad I made that second trip to the van for her.

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    On the ferry to work I felt incredibly relaxed. I have a lot of work to do today… some presentations to finish (that I will deliver next week) and also some speakers to still confirm!!!! Plus several meetings related to the client project. How am I working on client projects now too????!?!??!?!?!?

    Highlights of My Working Day:

  • I got some paperwork off related to my house purchase!!!!
  • I started to review and work on presentations; also had a meetings to review two different presentations that I had no part of data collections or report preparation. So I have to understand the data and understand the implications of the data. And think through how I will present it to make it interesting. That is the hard part because the data itself is kind of boring.
  • I had two market interviews for the client project.
  • I went to lunch with the office for Dim Sum. It was excellent and VERY fast.
  • I helped a colleague get in touch with one of my friends related to a project he is working on. She is going to help find the right person within her organization for him to have a market interview (THANK YOU MAMA J!!!! I KNOW YOU READ THIS!!!! THANK YOU AGAIN!!!!)
  • I worked with our admin on various logistics for the forums. Things that she was used to doing in the past I asked her not to do since I thought not a good use of time. I’m trying to make things easier and more streamlined.
  • I secured a Plan B speaker in case the our speaker for the one forum falls through. I almost hope they do, since I think the PLan B option is much more interesting for the group and I really like the guy.

    • I’m on the ferry now and looking forward to being with the children. I will be on my own tonight which always makes me happier. It is more relaxing. I can focus on the kids without the frustrations of the failed relationship getting in the way. The plans for the weekend are forming and I’m feeling good about getting away next week. I think we’re relatively prepared for the meetings but I know I’ll be working after the events and getting ready for the next day. Next week I will get little sleep and will need to be “on” the entire time.

    I’ve been thinking a lot about the house and am getting more and more excited. I will turn 42 this summer and I will be a first-time home buyer. The thought of having my own space, to put my own things, and root and grow with my family has been so important to me in the past. I’ve been craving it. I can’t believe it’s almost here and I was able to find a location zoned to 10/10 schools. I feel like I’ve done everything I could do to set myself and the kids up to be the best that we can be. I’m looking forward to getting in, settling in, and making the house a home.

    Dinner and Bedtime:

  • I picked up Red and we talked about dinner. We talked about ordering a pizza. I pulled over and ordered, then we picked up the Twins. Twin Crazy’s stockings were trashed. She was still talking about them. Twin Husky wanted to sit in Big Bro’s car seat. Red helped him into the van by lifting his butt in the air and pushing him in the van. Twin Crazy wanted to sit in between Twin Husky and Red in the back seat and Red and her were holding on to each other laughing before I pulled Twin Crazy away and tucked her into her own carseat. Sisters.
  • Big Bro’s pick up was good but it took a really long time for him to get his bike. I think he’s really taking advantage of the freedom… exploring the school yards, going in circles… I’m not sure but it takes him a long time and his face is always full of smiles when he shows up. Everyone in the car was singing and laughing while waiting for him. He took the lagoon route and wanted our car to go REALLY slow so he could beat us. I tried hard, but couldn’t go slowly enough so he was mad when he reached our van at the end of the lagoon trail.
  • By the time we got home, the pizza man was also arriving at our house.
  • After dinner, we noticed some motorcycles outside so we went out there to check them out.
  • We then decided to watch some “Olivia” on TV and got popcorn. All kids were excited for this.
  • Twin Crazy went poop in the potty so I gave her 2 chocolate chips. That was a mistake. The twins were going nuts during bedtime. Twin Husky threw a book and toys into the toilet. I told them I was feeling mad. That resonated with Twin Crazy. We sat and read books. I tucked them in.
  • Big Bro meanwhile was cleaning all the things that were thrown in the toilet. After I grabbed them and threw them in the sink, he had a process all set up for soaping up the stuff, cleaning, and drying them. He was a pleasure tonight. When someone else is acting up, Big Bro becomes an angel.
  • Twin Crazy was REALLY crying in her crib. It wasn’t a normal sounding cry. I went to her. I held her in my lap and Twin Husky wanted to come too. I asked her if she felt sad and she said YEAH. I asked her if it was because mommy felt mad and she said YEAH. I told her that sometimes people get mad, just like she does and just like Twin Husky, and Big Bro, and Red…. and that Mommy feels mad sometimes too and that’s OK. I told her that I still love her and will always love her and kissed her and asked her if she understood. She said YEAH. And Twin Husky did the same. I held them tighter and asked them if it was OK now for them to go to sleep. YEAH. Kisses. hugs. Back in their cribs. I covered Twin Crazy and Red covered Twin Husky. I wiped the hair away from her face and whispered my normal “I…….. love……. you” and again. She joined me in the routine. And she was OK. I went to Twin Husky and he was already rolling around smiling. “I…… love….. you. Sweet dreams.”.
  • I read to Big Bro. Again the story about the princess that dies. He now asks what happens after someone becomes dead. I talk about how no-one really knows for sure, but that a lot of people believe that your spirit, the thing that makes you FEEL and LAUGH and THINK and BE is inside of the body and that its called a spirit and that your spirit lives on even after your physical body is dead. He questions me on this each night and he picks out this book on purpose each night. His questions are very frank and I love that about him. He has always been curious about the world around him.
  • Red had a problem going to sleep. They were laughing with each other and I went in to scratch their backs… then went into the hallway to type this up… and then they crying. I think it happens as soon as Big Bro falls asleep. I think she feels the lonliness. She was laughing one minute and then upset the next. I keep trying to figure out is she scared, sad, lonely… maybe all? I try to talk to her about it but she is just silent. She is in there now quiet, and I think not yet asleep.

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    We had a great night. Easy. Real. No your turn my turn. No passing the kids off. It was just us. And we ate and played and the evening flowed. And when someone had an issue there was a child who was there to help. And even though it was only me with the four of them, I feel like I had really good one-on-one time with EACH of them. Talking to them. Encouraging them. Teaching them. I feel tired but happy.

    I think I’ll give myself a break tonight and only work on one presentation to send to a Director. Will do the rest at some point over the weekend.

    Great weekend to all –
    – Mama K

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    March 23: bedtime

    March 23, 2012 by 2 Comments

    I’m laying in bed, almost asleep. Realized that I never sent out a post, so here it goes on my iPhone.

    I sort of worked, and sortif parented today. I don’t feel like I did either particularly well. We had a meeting with the child custody mediator which always makes me feel defeated. I am so tired. I feel like issues which drowned the marriage are surfacing again here and I can’t stand it. I am ready to move on and start a new life damn it and temporary purgatory is going to make things harder for me. If it is better for the kids, fine…. I will do what should be done. But i feel like i am always the one that sacrifices. These feelings are still so raw and now there’s salt thrown at me. Just let me do what is right for these kids already.

    Ugh. What happened today?

  • red hid big bro,s Lego book with small coin inside. His favorite treasure. I had to get her to admit it and tell me where she hid it
  • twins were really cute playing with each other this am
  • drop offs for everyone went well
  • pick up for red was sweet. She was playing in the playground when we stole her away
  • big bro took the lagoon path again today after school
  • twin husky almost got lost in a bowl of applesauce
  • we went to see a magic show tonight
  • I had the twins for bedtime and they were both acting so happy and goofy
  • I also interviewed two candidates via phone
  • I reached out to potential guests and speakers for our forums

    • I’m feeling wiped out. Not a good worker. Not a good mother. Not moving forward. Staying still and immobilized due to other people’s fear. Haven’t we all gone through enough already? Just let us move on and get on with this new life already. Give me my energy back so I can focus on the kids where my focus should be. They need it.

    Zzzzzzzzzzz
    – mama k

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